


Sticky Situation

by sinivalkoista



Category: How to Train Your Dragon (Movies)
Genre: Awkwardness, Camicazi lifts his wallet, Camicazi makes it really awkward, Does she return it?, F/M, Grief/Mourning, Hiccup steals flowers from Camicazi for Astrid's grave, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Maybe - Freeform, No dragons, Non-Canonical Character Death, Past Character Death, Pickpockets, sorry - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-08
Updated: 2021-01-08
Packaged: 2021-03-18 19:40:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,440
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28623462
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sinivalkoista/pseuds/sinivalkoista
Summary: “So,” he drew the word out. “I was going to see someone, and at the last minute, I remembered I forgot to get her flowers, and yours were right here, and I was going to leave you an IOU note…”“Oh, really?” Camicazi arched an eyebrow. “Flowers for your girlfriend? Well, come on, then.” A girl was an entirely different matter.“What?”Camicazi began marching towards her car. He was wearing a nice watch that she wanted. “Come on! I’m driving you to see your girlfriend to see whether or not she’s worth flower theft.”And, if she wasn’t, Camicazi could at least get another watch out of the ordeal.She heard Mystery Thief’s footsteps patter behind her.“I’m not so sure this is a good idea!”She flung open the driver’s door to her car. “Get in.”
Relationships: Camicazi & Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III, Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III & Astrid Hofferson, Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III/Astrid Hofferson
Comments: 2
Kudos: 31





	Sticky Situation

Camicazi was quite good at - and enjoyed - alleviating people of their possessions.

(The doctors called it kleptomania; Camicazi called it a talent.)

Bluntly, she was a natural-born thief and didn’t mind it - in fact, she honed it. She could steal the knickers and cut the beard off a grown man while chatting to his face.

So she was a little insulted when she looked out the kitchen window and spied someone trying to  _ steal  _ flowers from  _ her  _ garden.

Of all the nerve, she fumed to herself, crossing her arms as she stared out the window,  _ her  _ garden.

Well, she wasn’t going to stand by and let some whippersnapper one-up her. She would show this  _ novice. _

She marched to the front door. Expertly, she twisted the knob and pulled it open without alerting the thief. In her head, she cackled as she tiptoed up to him, her toes barely denting the blades of grass beneath them. Really, this guy was an idiot because  _ everyone  _ knew that you should  _ always  _ be aware of your surroundings when pilfering goods. It went without saying.

Thor’s thunder, he didn’t even notice her when she stood right behind him and breathed like an elephant with asthma stuck in the middle of a Turkish bath. He just kept carefully picking flowers as though it were a perfectly honest pastime for a Saturday afternoon.

(Like she was one to talk.)

_ “Honestly,”  _ she began.

The guy jumped a foot in the air and fell over backwards, crushing half the flowerbed.

Not that it did much harm. Now that he wasn’t hunched over  _ her  _ flowers, she could see that she was skin and bones, his hair was as red as his face, and his eyes were as green as the grass clippings splattered on him.

Well, she wasn’t going to let the fact that he was  _ cute  _ stop her from giving him a good tongue lashing.

“ _ Honestly!”  _ she began anew. “Not only do you have the  _ audacity -  _ that’s such a big, lovely word to use in a situation like this, you know,  _ audacity -  _ do you understand what it means since you’re a boy? But you don’t have the  _ decency  _ to do it even the  _ least little bit  _ with some  _ stealth.  _ Nooo, you do it out in broad daylight! Are you trying to insult me?”

Like a crab, he lay on the ground, a panicked expression on his face. Now, he was the shade of a beet or some of the flower petals.

“I’m sorry!” he choked out. “I didn’t mean to-”

Camicazi rolled her eyes. A likely story. “You didn’t  _ mean  _ to walk thirty feet up my driveway? I know my house is  _ somewhat  _ close to the road, but even  _ that’s  _ a little ridiculous, hmm? Wouldn’t you agree?”

Mystery Thief winced.

Camicazi stepped forward and yanked him to his feet. While she did so, she checked the pockets on the front of his coat and nicked whatever was in them.

Oooh, a wallet. Stupid. He should have kept it in his back pocket. Not that the different location would have kept her from taking it.

Efficiently, she released Mystery Thief as soon as he was up and put her hands in her own pockets to store her prize.

Mystery Thief teetered to the left as though his leg were going to collapse from underneath him before he caught his balance.

“Ah.” He scratched the back of his neck with the hand that wasn’t clutching the flowers. “Uh...I didn’t mean to steal your flowers?” Weakly, he laughed.

Although she possessed a fine sense of humor, Camicazi was insulted. “What do you think I  _ am,  _ an idiot? Girls are smarter than boys, you know, poor things, though, since you can’t help it. You’re  _ stealing  _ my flowers. You can’t paint it  _ any  _ other way.”

If he kept scratching, he was going to have a patch of skull at the back of his head with no skin and no hair. “So,” he drew the word out. “I was going to see someone, and at the last minute, I remembered I forgot to get her flowers, and yours were right here, and I was going to leave you an IOU note…”

“Oh, really?” Camicazi arched an eyebrow. “Flowers for your girlfriend? Well, come on, then.” A  _ girl  _ was an entirely different matter.

“What?”

Camicazi began marching towards her car. He was wearing a nice watch that she wanted. “Come  _ on!  _ I’m driving you to see your  _ girlfriend  _ to see whether or not she’s worth  _ flower theft.”  _

And, if she wasn’t, Camicazi could at least get another watch out of the ordeal.

She heard Mystery Thief’s footsteps patter behind her.

“I’m not so sure this is a good idea!”

She flung open the driver’s door to her car. “Get in.”

After staring at her over the top, he got in the passenger seat.

Camicazi slid in, too, and cranked the engine.

Because he was  _ still  _ clutching  _ her  _ flowers as though they were the only things keeping him from floating about the nine realms, he had difficulty buckling his seatbelt.

With exaggerated annoyance, she reached over and did it for him...and slid the watch right off his wrist without him knowing.

Boys were  _ so  _ stupid.

Cheerily, she hit the gas.

“You  _ really, really  _ don’t have to come,” Mystery Thief said, his voice rising in pitch. “I can give you back the flowers. Or pay for them. Or both. Er...are you speeding?”

Ha. What a coward. He was probably worried that his girl would get the wrong impression and dump him. Or there really wasn’t a girl at all.

“Nope!” she answered cheerfully. “Won’t make a difference. If you try to back out, I’ll call the police and have you arrested.” Camicazi didn’t really know whether or not she would be able to prove anything (and she certainly couldn’t  _ keep  _ him in the car if he were  _ that  _ desperate), but Mystery Thief turned white and scrunched down in his seat, his coat almost swallowing him.

He looked miserable.

Fantastic!

“So...where, exactly, am I going?” Camicazi asked.

“Left a block up ahead,” he mumbled.

Whenever she jammed on the gas harder, he clutched the side knob on the door.

Camicazi grinned. She  _ loved  _ speed.

“Second right,” he told her after the left turn.

Suspiciously, Camicazi frowned. The section of town was  _ not  _ a housing district.

Eh, maybe his girlfriend was at work.

“Destination is on the right,” he repeated in a sarcastic, nasally GPS voice.

Camicazi spun the wheel and glanced up to read the sign.

It was a cemetery.

Mystery Thief had directed her to a cemetery.

Thor’s thunder, Camicazi was beginning to feel the least little bit guilty about the whole affair.

With less gusto than before, she pulled into one of the parking spaces and shut off the car.

As he unbuckled his seatbelt, Mystery Thief half turned to her. “Would you like to meet her?” he asked sarcastically.

For a moment or two, Camicazi’s mouth worked up and down like a fish’s.

So...perhaps she was a bit of an idiot…

Without waiting for her to answer, Mystery Thief turned around and began making his way to the entrance of the sematary.

Quickly, Camivazi decided that she was  _ not  _ going to let Mystery Thief know  _ just  _ how embarrassed she was and hurried after him. Whenever she drew up to him, he sent her a short glance but didn’t stop as he weaved through the tombstones.

They stopped in front of a plain grey one unadorned by chiseled wreaths or garlands or other decoration set in the stone.

ASTRID HOFFERSON HADDOCK

1995-2021

There was nothing else to indicate the type of personality of this Astrid Hofferson Haddock, but Mystery Thief gestured to the headstone and sarcastically said, “Astrid, meet the donor of your flowers. Donor, meet Astrid.” Despite the harsher quality of his words, he set down the flowers gently, almost  _ reverently.  _

Camicazi coughed. “So, lucky you, I won’t be pressing charges.”

Mystery Thief snorted.

“It was  _ lovely  _ meeting your girlfriend, really, but it’s a little too... _ dry  _ out here, you know, so I’ll be waiting in the  _ car.”  _

Camicazi had the feeling that if she stayed any longer, she would be intruding.

As though there was nothing awkward  _ at all,  _ she tramped back to the car and revved up the engine so she wouldn’t die of frost.

She  _ supposed  _ losing a couple of flowers was worth it. It wasn’t really any of her business now.

And if Mystery Thief found his watch, his wallet, and other various belongings in the passenger seat when he returned, then that really wasn’t  _ his  _ business.


End file.
